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This will be a major decision, so make sure to think through things deeply.

Anya Trahan about her book Opening Love to find out her answer to this question. Many people hear about poly and get really excited, thinking it's simply their ticket to having more casual sex without the guilt.

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Have choosr help you. Ask yourself about their health, for example — are they healthy and fit, do they eat well and take care of themselves?

First, congratulations. Does each of them know about your relationship with the other person? You need someone whose life is very much like your own.

Or are they emotionally flat, revealing few of their feelings? I believe if someone says they're torn between two lovers, they tend to be choosing between an established relationship and a new one. You've found two great guys and you've had the integrity (​and courage) to treat both with respect and openness. Case in point: A very.

Well then, you knew already who you would choose! Probably not.

Yow we struggle to trust our intuition about big decisions. Chances are, you might have a lot of strong sexual chemistry with the other one, but can you kick back and have a really good time? Be okay with that.

For example, maybe your list says you want someone who has all his hair. Then attachment, which still involves oxytocin in the brain, is more about that emotional bond that physical one. Journal about it. You take a risk in love every day, and this is no different.

But Peter is thinning. What should I do?

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Tracey says choosing between two people is usually about comparing an old relationship with a new one. Obviously, the person you anticipate seeing more is the person you care about more.

During this beteeen, you will have to pay attention to your feelings about both people. On the other, write down all the things you don't like.

How to choose between two men: 9 questions to ask yourself

Ideally, lovees want to pick the man who matches how you feel about him. Do you have proof or at least a strong reason to think so? The man you choose should make you feel like a better version of you.

But how well does it align with what you want? Or do they aggravate the negative factors in your character?

How to choose between two men: 9 questions to ask yourself

For instance, 'Doesn't get on with my friends' is something you could sort out even if it means seeing them without themso that gets a tick. Or has trouble talking about his feelings. Most long-term relationships go through boring patches and, if you meet someone rather tempting smack bang in the middle of one, that's when there's trouble Most long-term relationships go through boring patches and, if you meet someone rather tempting choode bang in the middle of one, that's when there's trouble.

Just carve out a few evenings or weekends to think about it.

I have feelings for two guys…what do i do?

Are you relieved or disappointed? Take your time and listen to your heart.

Compersion feels good for everybody; jealousy feels bad for everybody. And don't forget there is a third option: don't choose either of them.

Torn between two lovers: how to make the right decision for you

Are you llves to be more of yourself around one of them? Both are willing to see. Judge this as if you were blind but still had the same feelings for each person. There are certainly worse things than finding yourself caught in a love triangle, but try telling that to someone stuck in one.

Tracey cox reveals her method for choosing between lovers

Q: Your book begins with your own discovery, after you were married, that you had fallen in love with another person, while still loving your husband. You need to know where both people stand on serious issues. He may hoa hurt if he felt like he was falling for you, and he may brtween out angrily. What kind of a doctor are you? If that's the case, it probably is time to move on.

A: In addition to my work as a writer, I work as an energy healer.